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The Revelations of Asher

Toward Supreme Love in Self – (This Is an Endarkened, Feminist, New Literacies Event)

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Jeanine M. Staples

The Revelations of Asher: Toward Supreme Love in Self is an endarkened, feminist, new literacies event. It critically and creatively explores Black women’s terror in love. With poetry, prose, and analytic memos, Jeanine Staples shows how a group of Black women’s talk and writings about relationships revealed epistemological and ontological revelations, after 9/11. These revelations are presented in the context of a third wave new literacies framework. They are voiced and storied dynamically by the women’s seven fragmented selves. Through the selves, we learn the five ways the women lived as lovers: Main Chick, Side Chick, Bonnie, Bitch, and Victim. As an alternative-response to these identities in love, the author presents a new way. She introduces the Supreme Lover Identity and illuminates its integral connection to social and emotional justice for and through Black women’s wisdom.
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List #1 (Asher speaks: A list)

Extract

List #1

1.    Decide to love a man who likes to work.

This is a primary criterion because lazy men cannot formulate lasting relationships. Relationships are laden with grind. If you’re currently dating a man who doesn’t like to work, or can’t commit to small tasks, take him out of the running for partner and keep him in the category of “pal.” Signals about an individual’s work ethic litter the first few weeks of interaction. Unfortunately, they’re often ignored because everyone’s having so much fun. But the fun ends when the guy won’t talk about a recurring issue, has trouble staying employed or paying bills, or just can’t establish long-term goals or objectives. Ever met a guy who doesn’t like to work and is also good at partnership? Of course not.

On the other hand, a workaholic can be emotionally neglectful. The key is to find a balance. In the balance, look for a tendency to occasionally commit to tasks that are challenging or downright difficult. Such a tendency usually points to the presence of inner strength and integrity. If it’s too difficult for him to call you when he said he would, or invest time, energy, and money toward getting to know you better, you don’t want him. Incidentally, he probably doesn’t want you either. I’ve dated one or two lazy men. You know the type. They’re “artists,” “roughnecks,” “troubled by the system,” or “hassled by the man.” Um, that’s probably a pipe...

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